When you are young, you are meant to make mistakes in life. You are meant to make the wrong choices when it comes to money, career, love and more. You are meant to be learning from your mistakes. The thing that makes me laugh these days is that people are so scared to experiment, to delve too far from the straight and narrow, to have the kind of fun they’d always dreamed of having when they were growing up. In fact, this thought process was brought about by a pretty drunken fight with a guy mate. Apparently happy with his girlfriend of five years, he told me that casual sex was making me a bad person.
He was wrong, of course. Casual sex does not make me a bad person. It doesn’t make anyone a bad person. The fight of words ensued and up came my argument – how casual dating can make you a better person.
For a start, I have been on actual dates with some of the women I have casual sex with. I don’t just turn up at their houses, dick out, sex on the brain. Well, unless they ask for it, of course, and some of them do. They wouldn’t ask for it if they didn’t it. Technically, surely I’m providing a service?
I digress, on these dates, I talk to the women I plan on shagging ceremoniously later on that night, and I learn from them. Over the years I’ve learned that most women love it when you hold doors open for them, that it’s never appropriate to climax and leave them to their own devices without the hint of an orgasm on the horizon, and that paying for the cab home afterwards is generally the most chivalrous thing to do.
In many cases, I’m the closest thing to actual romance that these girls have gotten for a while. Don’t get me wrong, there is some serious rip-roaring sex going on in between these almost-romance dates, but even the dates are string-free and refreshingly simple.
Just because I like to have casual sex with chicks, doesn’t mean I can’t treat them to a good time first. It’s all about respect – you might be using them to get your end away that night, and most of them already know the drill before they meet you, but you don’t need to treat them like an object you wouldn’t normally give two craps about. In fact, a bit of respect can go a long way with the ladies, and it will get you a lot further in the bedroom and out of it, than being an asshole ever will.
In short, casual dating can make you a better person if you are smart enough and willing enough to open up your mind to it. What’s the point in having that many women in your bed if you can’t learn a new trick or two out of it, and you never know – the next girl you come across might be so impressed by your new found talents that she’ll literally be begging you for more…. Until she leaves right after that is, and you never speak to her again! 😉